Chapter 2 - Sydney to the Present Day

What a waste of a week.

I arrived in Sydney at about 10.15pm. It was about 30ºC, and I was still wearing my winter clothes from Launceston. Add a 20kg suitcase and two bulky carry-ons and you have a tired, sweaty, irritable Keith. Now add a 2km line for a taxi, and you get a Keith waiting to pull his hair out, but fortunately did not have any hands free. And this is just the beginning.

I stayed at the YWCA for the first two days, because Cilli’s brother was also in town and he’s obviously higher on the priority list. It wasn’t too bad, but I’m not here to write hotel reviews.

Monday began with me getting lost trying to locate the studios. When I finally got there, I thought I was in the wrong place. I thought I was at a modeling agency or something. Turns out it was the Sydney Dance Company studios. I got changed and warmed up in the studio. It was a ballet class with CG. There was no pianist or CD, therefore a ballet class in silence. Good times.

The class was bearable. As I was stretching and waiting for rehearsals to start so that I could learn a bit about the company by means of observation, CG comes up to me and says, “Rehearsals are starting, mate. You shouldn’t be here.”

I shouldn’t be here? Now, what does that mean? Don’t call me ‘mate’.

Anyway, I realized I wasn’t wanted, so I left. There must have been a misunderstanding. Maybe they don’t understand the word ‘secondment’. The problem was that now I had too much time to think, and to feel like I was failing once again. I think there’s only so much failure one can handle before a breakdown is required. If it wasn’t for Ela and Molly, I would have definitely found an opportunity to jump off the Sydney Harbour Bridge.

It was easier once I moved into Cilli’s place. I continued to do the warm up class with the company. I thoroughly enjoyed Adam Linder’s improvisation classes. However, I knew I was wasting my time, and I needed to go home. I was feeling very anxious and mentally exhausted. I booked a flight home for Friday. So that brings me here to Perth, to the present day.

I’ve taken a break from dancing for a week now, and I think it has helped. I spent the week just hanging out at home, drinking tea, swimming, baking, watching rented videos and not thinking about dance. Now I just have to wait for the contract to arrive, so I can finally break the news publicly. I don’t want to jinx it.

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